Is it tips for your one-on-one meeting you’re looking for? You’ve come to the right place. But before we jump in, let’s set the scene. The one-on-one meeting is possibly the most lightweight management tool you can use in your fledging company. We wrote at length here about what a one on one meeting is, why you should have it and some general one on one tips. In this post, we’ll go through best practices in more detail.

What is a one-on-one meeting?

Classically, the one-on-one meeting is a consistently recurring, timeboxed meeting between a manager and a direct report. However, since one-on-ones are so useful. I’ve seen companies as small as just two co-founders having them and there the relationship is more horizontal rather than vertical. So don’t get too hung up on the hierarchy of people in a one-on-one meeting. It doesn’t change their purpose and general structure.

One-on-one meetings help the flow of information from top to down and from down to up. As a manager you can share or explain the vision of the company or a shift in the market. You can talk about how the organization is growing and what challenges it faces. As an employee, you can share your aspirations and frustrations, motivations and barriers. One-onones are designed to be a space where candid conversations can happen about mostly work but also life and everything else in-between.

Therefore the one-on-one meeting provides a constant informal pulse of your organization, something that is invaluable as a manager. Imagine if you wouldn’t keep your finger on this pulse, you’d only get to know about problems when they are too late. You’d have to communicate changes in vision, strategy or the organization in a formal, top-down manner, something that has been proven to yield worse results. But you already know this and convinced you should start having one-on-ones. Or you are already doing them and just interested in some one-on-one tips. Whichever it might be, let’s get started.

One-on-one meeting tips

1. Set up a recurring meeting for the same time each week

When you become a manager of people, your day immediately gets busier. Even if it doesn’t it’ll sure look like it to anyone else. This means that people will have a hard time scheduling ad hoc meetings with you and might not even try. Set your one-on-one meetings up in advance for the same time each week. A good practice as a manger is to block off an entire day for one-on-ones. This will also help you avoid some of the other pitfalls we’ll discuss below.

2. Dedicate at least 30 minutes

As your company scales like crazy you might be tempted to think that you could optimize the time you spend on management by cutting down on people’s one-on-one time and get it over with with 10-15 minutes each. You’ve got 10 people working for you, that’s more than 2 hours potentially saved each week. No, they don’t work for you, as a manager, you’re working for them. Any meaningful conversation takes longer than 15 minutes.

A good rule of thumb is to dedicate at least 30 minutes to your one-on-one s and leave a 15 minute buffer after for any other meetings or tasks you might have coming up. If everything is smooth sailing you can use the extra 15 minutes to reflect on the one-on-one you just had or get some quick tasks off your plate or to grab a coffee and walk around a bit to relax.

3. Don’t cut the meeting short

This should go without saying since we talked about setting up a recurring meeting and dedicating a fixed time for it and the benefits of these approaches. However, I’ve seen this happen all too often so I think it’s important to mention. Do not cut a one-on-one meeting short because of something short of an outright emergency.

When you cut a one-on-one short it signals to the other person that whatever was the reason is more important to you than them. Even worse, it might signal that you’re incompetent at your job since you can’t even plan to set aside a set amount of time for something this personal and important. If all lights are green and there’s nothing to worry about, your team member might initiate to end the one-on-one early. This is fine and it’s okay to go along with it. But you shouldn’t be the one to propose this.

4. Never skip a one-on-one meeting

It seems easy to bail on a one-on-one in the face of other burning issues. After all, you talk every week, right? What can just one week delay cause? While one-on-one meetings might seem less directly mission critical when you’re in the tranches fighting fires, getting on calls with angry customers, talking to disinterested investors and trying to still make time for that one task you still need to do, don’t skip one on ones.

Just think about it, every time you skip a one-on-one meeting you send a clear message to your team member, “You don’t matter”. At least not as much as that quarterly investor update that you knew was coming up but you didn’t do it because you hate it. Every time you skip a one on one you become less in the eyes of your team. Don’t do it.

5. Start with “How are you?”

This is the perfect opener for any one-on-one. “How are you?” is a simple question where the answer is often very complicated. And that is where the one-on-one begins, with the answer. Depending on the tone and content of the answer you’ll decide where to go from there. Everything okay and you’re just checking in on each other? Is there a lingering issue that need to be solved so that value creation can continue unhindered? Is there a showstopper disaster that needs your undivided attention? It all starts with “How are you?”

This is also why you need at least 30 minutes for your discussion. Both of you needs to leave the daily grind of the business behind for a bit and reflect. A good way to start is by acknowledging how we’re feeling and then examine what are the likely causes of those feelings. If one has an idea on how to mitigate or reinforce the causes it’s great to bring it up. However, remember that you shouldn’t try to jump on everything and try to offer a seemingly quick solution. Just listen first, acknowledge how the other person is feeling and go from there. A lot of times, just sharing hardships can help or make the person realize the course of action they should take.

6. It’s not a status update

“How are you?” is also a great way to avoid another pitfall of one-on-one meetings, them turning into a status update. Because what a one-on-one is not is a way to keep on top of the to dos of the other person, to report on progress or to ask for the status of tasks. Pay attention to this as it is easy to fall back into this pattern if there is not much to talk about or if the team member doesn’t feel comfortable to talk about something. It is your job as a manager to make them feel comfortable to share. And while it might be easier for both of you to just talk about the status of ongoing things, don’t be tempted by it.

7. Don’t issue work tasks

Just like you shouldn’t turn a one-on-one meeting into a status update, you should also not use them to issue tasks related to daily operations. It is okay if based on your conversation your direct report comes up with stuff to do on their own, but you shouldn’t be the one instructing them in this meeting.

As far as one-on-one tips go, this one has an exception and it is when the task relates to an issue you’re discussing. Let’s say the person complains that the dev team is always frustrated that not all edge cases are covered on user stories and it brews resentment towards them, the PO and they are unsure how to deal with this. While you might know a great way to solve this, instead of outright instructing the person to use your method, you should gently guide them towards coming up with the solution themselves. This could mean that an action item for the next one on one meeting is to do some research on this problem and come up with a proposal. Note that this is not about what to do, but rather how things are done.

8. Follow up on your action items

As a manager it is your job to make sure your team can maximize their potential and deliver the most amount of value to users and to the business. In most of the cases you as the manager will end up with a lot of action items after a one-on-one meeting. One of the most important one-on-one tips is that you should make sure you either have completed or have something credible to show on the next one-on-one relating to your action items.

9. Keep things confidential

As far as one-on-one meeting tips go, this one is probably the most important. For successful one-on-one meetings, trust is very important. A lot of these one-on-one tips centered around building and keeping that trust. But a surefire way to damage it, maybe even permanently is to not keep something that was shared in private confidential.

So before you think about sharing some feedback with another team member for example, do ask for permission from the person who shared it. And when it comes to personal matters, it’s probably best not to even ask and just keep them between you two. Nobody wants to hear on an All Hands meeting that the company is giving everybody Headspace subscriptions because they had a panic attack at work.

Takeaways from these one-on-one meeting tips

I think you can spot a pattern here, people expect managers to be responsible, organized, accountable, trustworthy but relatable. It is not easy to pull all of this off and still keep the boundary between manager and team members. This is where I hope these 9 one-on-one tips help.

Do you have some one-on-one tips of your own? Do share them in the comments below.

Get focused

We here at Focus think that one-on-ones are an essential part of your management toolbox along with OKRs, check-ins and recognition. Check out how Focus can help you become a better manager and your team to maximize their potential.

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So you are curious about what a one on one meeting is? Before we jump in, let’s zoom out a bit. Business is very often just pure chaos. It is doubly so for organizations that are younger, smaller, more agile or just plain scrappy. It is also this environment where founder CEOs and other self made C-level people don’t have a tried and true toolset and decades of experience to fall back onto. While OKRs, daily check-ins and such are all great, they don’t address the fundamental management problem young organizations are facing. One on one meetings are the definitive solution. Let’s dive in.

What is a one on one meeting?

One on one meetings are the setting where two people, manager and employee can talk freely about themselves, their pains, successes, hurdles and aspirations, the company, the market and life in general. It is the focused space that transcends firefighting, snarky comments on Slack, gossip and watercooler chatter. While these are all part of a healthy business, they can drown out the somber voice and the genuine cries for help. As a manager, your main task is to enable your team to be able to do their jobs to the fullest extent they can today and to grow tomorrow.

How will you know if someone is facing personal challenges that affect their performance? If they don’t get along with someone else in the company? If they have a trivial problem like not being able to set up their VPN and get no help from anyone? Yes, the one on one meeting is the ideal setting for these.

If you are interested in reading a book about one on ones and just about how to manage people in the software industry, I highly recommend Managing Humans by Michael Lopp.

The dos and don’ts of the one on one meeting

Do

• Set up a weekly recurring cadence
• Have it at the same time and the same place every week
• Make it at least 30 minutes long
• Start with “How are you?”
• Follow up on your action items by the next one on one meeting

Don’t

• Do not cut the meeting short
• Don’t make it a status update
• By no means should you share details with others without consent
• Avoid giving tasks in the one on one meeting
• Don’t EVER miss a one on one meeting

Now that we looked at some general dos and don’ts of the one on one meeting, let’s look at the three broad types of them. What should you expect and prepare for when you’re going into your first on on one?

The 3 types of one on one meetings

The check-in

In a healthy organization, most one on one meeting will not be a heated conversation. Instead, it’ll be more like an update on what’s going on, how’s everybody feeling, minor pieces of improvement and feedback but nothing major. Why should you still do one on one meetings if some of them will be nothing more than confirmation that things are going smooth? Precisely for that reason.

Imagine this scenario: your team member has consistently missed the daily standups this week which is unusual for them. What is going on? Are they completely demotivated? Checked out? Looking for another job already? You might assume the worst and thus as any good manager, you’ll concentrate on trying to solve these perceived issues and prepare for the worst. This will distract you from items that might truly need your attention but without more information you can’t prioritize effectively. Sure, you could schedule an ad hoc meeting with your team member, or try to catch him while getting coffee but these can easily come across as too overbearing.

Lucky that your organization does one on one meetings so you can meet and discuss anything. You’ll ask: “How are you?” and he’ll reply that he’s fine, maybe a bit stressed. Why is he stressed? Turns out he is moving house and the movers keep rescheduling last minute day after day. Is this something you as his manager can solve? No. Is this information going to help you prioritize. Oh yes. Now you know that you’ll just need to be more patient with him and the situation will resolve itself with time. In the meantime, you can help him out by subtly managing the expectations from the rest of the team and downplaying the effect of him being late rather than leaning into it. Your team member will feel like they are heard and even cared for, all thanks to the little weekly 30 minute one on one meeting.

The rant

I wish I could say that the update is the most common one on one meeting archetype. But I won’t. Based on my experience, especially when it comes to earlier stage, smaller companies, things are rarely smooth sailing and it will show. If you don’t have one on ones, any frustration that builds in your direct reports will lead to loss of motivation, decrease in performance, toxic behavior and ultimately a burned out team member. As a manager it should be your only job to prevent this and actually reverse it. Support your team members to perform better, grow into a better version of themselves, keep motivated, curious and engaged and ultimately deliver the maximum value possible to your customers and the business in a sustainable way.

Let’s say you decided to introduce one on one meetings, now you have a valve on the pressure cooker that is your organization. The thing is, you’re in the way of the hot steam coming out and you’ll need to know how to deal with it. So when you ask “How are you?” and the reply is less than convincing or outright hostile, you know you’re dealing with a rant. It’s okay, this is useful and you can do this.

Hint 1 – Just listen

First of all, listen, don’t try to solve every problem right away. A lot of times people just want to be listened to, to share their frustration, to feel like they are not alone. By being a good listener you’re already scoring points with your direct report. These are the first steps for a trusting work relationship. Once you think they are over the initial burst, do ask follow up question if you need to. Try to understand what caused the frustration. Is it another team member? A process that doesn’t make sense? Misaligned expectations? The person’s own shortcoming? Something you might have done? Or some completely external factor you have no control over?

Once you identified the likely cause, you can start to guide your team member to come up with a solution on their own. Don’t underestimate the importance of this. If people come up with a solution themselves they are much more likely to follow through with it and after owning the process of resolving any conflict, they will also own the win. Remember, the measure of success for a manager is the success of those they manage.

Hint 2 – Action items

At the end of a rant, you should be able to either come to a resolution in the meeting itself, or come up with a list of action items either you or your direct report needs to complete. It is very important that neither of you lose track of these as it is expected that progress will be made by the next one on one unless explicitly stated. Write these down somewhere where you won’t forget about them. Or you could try using a dedicated software solution for one on ones, more on this at the end of the article.

The disaster

What is an ongoing rant that seemingly has no resolution? Yes, it is a disaster. Once a person reaches a point where they seemingly have given up, it’s hard to turn back. When someone answers the “How are you?” question with an empty stare, sharing that they are completely unmotivated or that they feel depressed you know you’ve got a disaster on your hand. Lots of times people in disaster mode won’t even wait for you to ask your standard question, they’ll blurt out what’s bugging them. It can be that they say they can’t take it anymore, it referring to something they ranted about in the past but is still a problem. It can be trying to resign or threatening to quit. Or it can be simply a cry for help, without specifics.

Look, it’s a problem that the disaster is here. There should have been plenty of rants that led up to this and you failed to help the person resolve their conflicts. So what can you do about it? First of all, you need to reassure the person that their concern is your top priority (if it wasn’t before) and that you’ll work with them to resolve it.

In some cases, especially when this is just the latest in a string of disaster type one on ones, you will have to think about how the person fits into your organization. Sometimes, the best course of action for both parties is to amicably part ways.

Software for running a one on one meeting?

While you can run an effective one on one with just a pen and a piece of paper or a notes app, we think we have a better way. Making the most of your one on one meetings requires both parties to be on top of the topics they want to discuss, any action items that need a resolution before the next meeting and to see these evolve over time. Check out Focus to see how you can supercharge your one on one meeting.

The post What is the one on one meeting? appeared first on Focus.

They’ve already achieved outstanding results in the area your organization operates. They are full of energy and tell anyone who will listen how awesome it is at work in your company. If you ask for working overtime, they do it – and happily. If you don’t, they unquestionably would if you did. They are the least likely to quit, and the most likely to pull others in your company. 

How did you do that? How did you create this team?

To answer those questions, let’s turn the clock way, way back — the time when the people were hired in your company. In this article, we talk about 5 crucial steps that help you to build a fantastic team.

1. Hire the best

You know, I don’t want to be captain obvious, but it’s easier to recruit the right candidates and give them all opportunities for achievements then hiring people whom you will be trying to motivate. The road from hundreds of resumes to your best employee is started with understanding the ‘right’ resume. 

Think about what’s really necessary for an individual to achieve the job’s goals. Define the job before hiring an employee. For example, persistence, listening skill, and learning ability often are more important for a sales manager than a degree from a cool university or work experience in your industry.

2. Company goals

To manage your team effectively, let’s try to do a little test. How many employees know your company goals? Just ask them about it. It’s crucial for team management that people know the main organization’s goals and understand how they participate in it.

Start asking employees about 1-3 main goals of your company. It gives a lot of insights into what people are thinking about the organization. Once you’ve understood all the opinions, keep going through the employee’s value. Show the individual how he or she impacts the company’s goals. It’s super important for people for getting value out of their job.  

Also, notice how different opinions you have now from your team members. Don’t forget to implement the workflow that helps you to make company goals transparent and show employees’ influence on it.

3. Personal goals

Alright! Now, that you’ve already built a transparent company’s goals in your workflow, let’s take the next step and create an outcome-driven culture. When approaching this, it’s really, really important to remember that employees do not want to devote their life to complete the company’s goals. They want to be passionate about what’re they working on and see their self-development. 

For that reason, your experience shouldn’t be defined by the milestones you create, but instead by the improvement of their life your company provides. Create individual development plans with employees that give your employees roadmap with measurable goals and timeframe for achieving these goals. You can read this article to get more information about individual development plans.

Take the time to get very clear on what kind of ‘better people’ your company makes. It will inform everything that follows from here, so it’s super important to get right. 

4. Communication

Communication often challenges for many teams. We receive a lot of new information in our email boxes and messengers. Everyone wants to get our attention in different ways. While you’re trying to avoid a lot of noise from various channels, it’s hard to build alignment across the teams.

You want your entire organization to be not only aligned around company goals but also has a workflow where everyone clearly understands each other. It’s hard, especially in that volume of communication. Many teams spend their time in the meetings to do their work better and build alignment. But you know that often meetings are not really productive. Regarding a Microsoft survey, an employee spends 27 hours per week for meetings. Wherein only 10% of employees called these meetings useful. People like to solve issues and make deals, but not discuss it.

When you design workflow for goals achievements, not discussing – it relieves a huge amount of employees’ energy and time. But how to set this kind of workflow, which reduces the time in meetings and synchronize the team? 

For each touchpoint, think about outcome-driven culture – what’s important to the company at that particular time? What the real goal of a meeting? In most cases, it’s planing, problem-solving, making decision, or synchronization with the team. And it ends with improving employees – the kind of people who can deal with all staff better than before that.

For most of these reasons, you can use a simple framework, which helps people understand what’s going and simplify communication between members. For example, you can use three questions to synchronize the team every day:

• What did you do yesterday?
• What are you going to do today?
• What was the biggest obstacle?

You can use it in different cases either on short meetings aka standups or on online meetings via text. Also, you can set asynchronous conversation when everyone answers to the questions when it’s convenient for the person. It takes several minutes per day and helps to focus on the main goals. No long meetings – more time for work. You might even automate this process by using special bots or software like Focus that helps to run standups each day.

It’s only one piece of communication that you can implement in your workflow. Just start thinking about focusing on outcomes and simplifying current procedures. It gives you a lot of insights that the company’s processes, which were invented long ago, are not optimized for the current structure. 

5. Recognition

68% of companies who implemented an employee recognition system report a positive effect on employee engagement. At the same time, employees don’t feel recognized in most companies. There is a huge potential for managers on how you can increase employee engagement. Just implement a recognition system. To understand better how to do it correctly, we need to talk about common issues there.

The main problems with recognition are:

i. Wrong recognition

It’s kind of like a bad-suited jacket – you’re giving appreciation to the employee, but he or she doesn’t like it. For instance, a person can avoid public recognition because of a person’s modesty. Sometimes you can give appreciation either in the not right moment or situation. It’s a manager’s job to know the characteristics of each member of the team and understand how and when sharing appreciation. 

ii. Non-specific recognition

General “thank you” or “great job!” are good, but you know, it’s not the best way for appreciation. To get them, a significant recognition begins to be specific like “Thank you for your help with launching a new product, especially, with creating the awesome design in a short time.” Also, show them which value you recognize in their work.

How to implement a recognition system?

That’s why it’s crucial to implement a recognition system in the team that helps everyone to be specific and recognize co-workers at the right moment. You should understand the character of each employee in the team and the ways how they react to appreciation. The common practices for building recognition system correct are:

• Do recognition regularly
• Do public or private appreciation, depends on an employee character
• Do it online to write down this moment. It’s like a ’success diary’ with their achievements. It helps you to see the traction and motivates employees to reach the new accomplishments.

Sketchdeck says feedback is the key to navigation remote-waters and we agree 100%.

Conclusion

Building an amazing team is challenging for any founder or manager. There is no secret mechanic that you can use for creating a really powerful organization. It’s always about a combination of things where you should be the pro. To summarise crucial parts for team management: 

• Hire the best candidates
• Set clear company goals and ask your employees about its
• Create an employee development plan with personal goals
• Build a simple and outcome-oriented workflow in communication
• Implement employee recognition correctly

In Focus, we eat our own food while creating software that helps teams increase performance and build high-engaged culture. Our goal is to simplify workflow with transparent goals, clear communication, and employee recognition. In Focus, it’s easy to create a company and personal goals when everyone will be able to see how he or she impacts the company goals. In fact, managing a company is hard, and we want to make it better when everyone in a team gets benefits from that. 

Share in the comments below your experience on how to create an exceptional team. 

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